Well here I am....all of me...the good, the not so good and the forever grateful and thankful that God found me in a world full of darkness.
Where to start? There are so many things I want to say and so so many things I could share........right deep breath and lets have a think. Got it!!!!!
Lets start, as I was growing up, my Nan was and still is the biggest influence for F A I T H in my life. She is a Born Again Christian, I have never known someone who I can talk to so easily about God. We both learn from each other. encourage one another chat about God with each other and pray together. I will never forget the first time I heard nan speak in tongues it was like she was speaking jibberish we still laugh about it now.
When we were little we would sleep over at Nans on a weekend and then Sunday we would go to church. It was the best, pub tea Saturday night, then lots of games and cuddles and then church Sunday Morning. We would get dressed, Nan would always look so smart and chic, her fashion was on point as she worked in a clothing store but it was old school fashion. skirt, tailored jacket, blouse, heels and clip on earrings, stunning is the word I would describe for her. Off to church we would go, she would say hello to everyone, one thing you should know about my Nan is she's very much a people person and so am I. She's also a hugger and gives the best hugs even now.
So my journey with God began around this time when I was 6 I would say. I would always stay in the service and never go to Sunday School, I would love listening to the sermons and always felt much lighter when i left the church.
Being a Yearly Christian
For a long time I was what I call a "Yearly" Christian. As I grew older I always believed in God and I prayed but I was not really close to God or knew him. In my teenage years I was off the handle, didn't really think about God too much and just continued with life. A lot of things happened but I would still go to church once maybe twice a year. Christmas was ALWAYS a given, me, Nan and Mom would go to Chris-tingle. For those who don't know what this is its a service on Christmas Eve where you go to sing and light an orange that represents the birth of Jesus Christ coming into the world. There is an orange (representing the world) a red ribbon around the orange (representing the blood of Christ) then 4 sticks of sweets (representing the 4 seasons) and a candle in the middle (representing Jesus - the Light of the World).
The other time I used to attend was Easter, this was always important to me it was to celebrate that Jesus Christ died for us on the cross and he conquered death. defeated all sin and rose again 3 days later. Going to church allowed me to feel I was still connected to God and I knew I had him in my life.
Now fast forward through a lot of events I was around 24/25, I was in a church service for Easter with my Nan to the right of me and a leaflet said "Freedom In Christ". Now I don't know why but something inside said I needed to attend this course and I was to sign up straight away. I turned to my Nan and said "I'm going to do this!" and I did.....and WOW what a journey it has been.
Starting with God
This was my first step to my relationship with God. I attended a course called Freedom in Christ, I did it all a little backwards but hey it doesn't matter how as long as we come to know the Lord right!? I learned about God, and how there are stumbling blocks (will go into more detail about this on another blog), but things didn't really make a lot of sense if I'm honest. I never really felt like I knew much about God or the gospels or the stories etc. So my Nan got me my first proper bible for my Birthday....it was a study bible and oh my it spoke to me!
Alpha
Then I did something called Alpha. Many churches offer this to new believers or people who want to know about God and the Christian faith. This is where God showed me so much and I started to have a true foundation of who God is. I may have not mentioned before but one of my giftings from God is that I am a Seer. I see visions and dreams from God and he shows me things visually as well as other ways. Well in one session I was finding it really difficult to understand the trinity (God the Father, Christ the Son & the Holy Spirit). When God showed me a 3 tier wedding cake. Now the other thing you need to know is that I absolutely LOVE cake!!! Yes cake!! Any kind, even coffee and carrot it's sugary goodness is just YUM!!!
Understanding 3 in 1
So anyway.....the cake below is very much what God showed me.
3 tiers and they all had a meaning. So the bottom tier is the foundation - this is Jesus - he is the foundation of the Body of Christ and the corner stone, because he died on the cross and died for our sin, he conquered death because he rose again and ascended into heaven to his Father 3 days later. Then the middle tier - Holy Spirit - the spirit of God lives in us and guides us with everything and then the top tier - is God the Father - he covers all and there is no limits with God, he is limitless and the God of the impossible.
I then started to go to church regularly, I would attend every Sunday service I possibly could, would join groups in the middle of the week. My first group was something called "The Huddle". Was great I learnt so much from everyone, there was myself our Vicar Matt, Mike, Steve, Faye and Lisa. We would learn from each other, listen and pray. I will never forget one night the Holy Spirit came over me and every time Matt tried to pray I couldn't stop laughing, I had the giggles, I didn't know what had come over me, I carried on laughing and Lisa started too.
Soon after this I became a warden. The church I attended was a parish of the Church of England. I served as a warden for 1 year, I had always attended this church since I was little but God started to show me about religion and told me it was time to move on.
Ministry
I joined another Ministry God lead me to and it was completely different. God was bringing me out of religion and learning how to walk in freedom. I attended something called "Freedom in Christ" but this nothing like the one I had joined before, this was more like a spring cleaning spiritually. It was with Darkness to Light ministry that I learned about the spiritual realm and the physical realm, learned how to pray and truly knew what it was meant to have a RELATIONSHIP with God. I had been living so much just getting by not even truly knowing Gods glory or what he could do. How could I have been so asleep???? I wasn't bothered at this point I was on fire for God and just wanted to know him more and more. I will always be so grateful for every person God put in my life...they taught me so much....and when I look back I have such fond memories. I really do love them all.
My Baptism
In 2018 I got baptized after being led into Freedom. Walking in freedom is so amazing, there is no words that can describe it unless you feel it but I will have another blog on Walking in Freedom and how and what this means. All I can say is that my life changed, I remember walking outside for the first time and seeing all the colours in creation around me. I am a lover of trees and the sky anyway but this day it was as though I saw colour for the first time. It was though everything must have been such a dull shade before but today I saw the brightness in everything. My heart was full of so much joy and I could feel Gods presence inside me.
Funny story about my baptism....God told me to be reborn again I needed to be baptize, as a child I had been christened but this is a religious ceremony performed, and as I had received the Holy Spirit this was to seal it. This was my time to accept Jesus and commit myself to God and have a true relationship with him. So I got baptized in a bath....YES a bath in a house. I had people from the ministry gathered at our elders house, the angels were all around in the bathroom and everyone started to sing. Lasona (our elder) baptized me in the bath and we cheered, rejoiced and prayed together afterwards. For me I didn't feel anything happen being baptized, because I had already got rid of the rubbish this was a seal stamped of approval from God ready for my next journey but others say they feel something leave them or a wash of the Holy Spirit comes upon them and they start speaking in tongues.
"Jesus answered, “Very truly I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless they are born of water and the Spirit." John 3:5 NIV
My Ministry
In 2022 God led me to leave the ministry and go alone. He hadn't told me anything else, and I didn't know what was in store, just that it was time to leave and God would show me what was needed. Now we are in May 2023 and I am writing this blog. The only instruction I had was to write a blog about him and there are a few other things in the pipeline but it's still very early days to share!
I am so happy that I have God, I really wouldn't be here if I didn't. A lot of my testimony will be explained in different parts of this website as there is so much to share.
What I want you all to know is when we are obedient with God, knowing or not knowing what he has in store for us he loves us and sees the bigger picture. Take the step and be obedient it opens so much up and you never know how it will effect your life or someone elses.
No matter what is happening, me and my nan always say to each other:
"God is good all of the time and all of the time God is good!! Amen to that!"
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